You know what they say, you don’t get to choose who you fall in love with—but you do get to choose how you navigate the breakup.
Having a good breakup doesn’t mean that everything ends up “all good” or that nobody gets hurt. It means taking steps to move on from the relationship as gracefully as possible. Because this is an experience that’s going to shape your life no matter what. Here are some steps for having the best breakup possible:
When it comes to heartbreak, honesty is key. If you’re not being honest with yourself and your partner, you’re likely not going to have a good breakup.
- With that your relationship might not be working out.
- With what you need and want from the person who is leaving you.
- About what things don’t work in the relationship. why they don’t work so that they can improved upon or avoided altogether by other people in the future.
Support is key, and a friend or family member can be the perfect person to talk to. Talking through your emotions with someone will help you to feel less alone. If you don’t have anyone in your life to offer that kind of support, consider seeing a therapist instead. A trained mental health professional will allow you to process the situation. And without hurting anyone’s feelings or being judged for what happened between you and your ex-partner.
Once you’ve come to the realization that your relationship is over. Take some time to reflect on what happened in the relationship and why.
This is not only helpful for understanding what went wrong, but it will also help you understand why you are upset. Understanding this aspect of yourself can be important in helping you move forward and heal past wounds.
Understanding yourself helps to figure out what kinds of things we need from our partners. Both now and in future relationships. so that we can avoid making similar mistakes again.
Take some guilt-free time to spoil yourself
This is your chance to be selfish and have a good time, so don’t feel bad about it! Go out for dinner with friends or treat yourself to something you’ve been wanting but couldn’t justify getting before. Get a massage, watch a movie and take a nap, or read a book from start to finish without doing any work at all (even if it’s just one chapter).
Give yourself permission to be angry
You may think that being angry is bad, or that you are already too angry, but anger is a normal part of the grieving process. It’s also very important for healing after a breakup. If you’re not feeling any anger at all during your breakup, then something is wrong and you should speak with a professional (a therapist or counselor) about how to get better help with this situation.
The only thing worse than getting over an abusive relationship quickly is staying in it longer than necessary because you’re afraid of being angry and confused by all these new emotions that are coming at you from every direction!
Don’t let others define how you should feel.
When it comes to how you feel about a breakup, don’t let anyone define how you should feel. You might be angry or sad, and that’s okay. It’s normal for things like anger and sadness after a breakup or divorce.
If someone tries to tell you otherwise (for example, “You’ll feel better soon”), let them know that this isn’t true for everyone and that they need to respect your emotions as they are right now. If they still insist on pressuring or shaming you into acting differently than how you’re feeling at the moment, then remember: they’re not trying to make things better—they just want control over your life again—and their opinion is probably not worth listening to anyway!
Let go of expectations
Expectations are what you think you deserve, and this can be a source of unnecessary stress for your relationship.
You can’t control other people’s behavior, so it’s better not to have expectations at all.
If your partner doesn’t behave in the way that you want them to, it is likely that they aren’t behaving in the way they want either. They may feel just as frustrated by their own behavior as you do by theirs! It is important not to let your feelings about this get twisted into anger or resentment toward your partner; instead, try looking for ways that you can help each other grow and improve together.
If you’re feeling disappointed or dissatisfied with how things are going between the two of you and don’t know why—or if expectations are causing the problem—it could be helpful to ask yourself these questions: What am I expecting my partner’s behavior should look like? How would my life change if those expectations were met? Is there anyone else whose relationship might provide some guidance for me here?
Breakups Can be bad, But they don’t have to be permanent
Breakups can be bad, but they don’t have to be permanent. If you’ve ever experienced a breakup—or if you’re currently going through one—you know that it can feel really awful. It’s tempting to think about these moments as the end of something important, but in reality, breakups are an opportunity for growth and change. They force us to reflect on our relationships with ourselves and others, which ultimately helps us become better people.
As soon as you’ve ended your relationship, start thinking about how much better off you’ll be without this person in your life. You might even want to consider taking a few days off from seeing each other after the breakup so that both parties can get their heads straight before moving forward with whatever comes next (which may or may not include friendship).
Remember, breakups are painful and confusing. We can’t always tell exactly why things didn’t work out with a partner.And we can’t always be sure that the decisions we made in the relationship are the ones that were best for us. If you’re hurting, if you’re angry, or if you’re just plain confused—that’s okay!
But it’s important to give yourself time to process your emotions. And to make sure that you’re getting all of the support you need. And don’t forget: this too shall pass! No matter how much it feels like your breakup is going to define who you are forever—it won’t. Cherish those feelings now. you will probably wouldn’t be human if they didn’t hurt right now—but know that ultimately, everything will be okay.